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; iloveyou ♥

Monday, December 30, 2013 ♥
♥ 12/30/2013 02:53:00 pm

ONE more day to the end of 2013. 
Reflection of myself every year and setting up new resolutions for the 2014. Sad to say, it will never able to fulfilled. LOL.
Wait, i guess i did something, hmmm, I SLIM DOWN. haha.. That is the resolution i always set for myself every year since the day i know i have to lose weight, and i did it. Because people been telling me i too skinny le. I so happy that i able to wear UK 8 for bottom. WAHAHAHA ;p

Back to the topic of the year 2013
There were good and bad for this year. I really appreciated those came into my life and guided me along the way. I'm lucky to have a group of best friends, though we don't meet up often, no longer working together, and yet u all stood by my side, giving me advice, help me along the way i grown up.
And i truly believe i able to stand on my feet once again.





Latest of me.
 On the way to the store dinner. At 50 Duxton road, Etna Italian Restaurant.
I know my face is too chui la .

Been mind fucking myself for the past 2 weeks, thinking what actually went wrong between me and him.
 I trying so hard and pushing myself to the limits and smoking my life away.
 How can a person change so much within 1 month or less to someone i don't even feel the same anymore.
 i would rather you hurt me once and for all. 
You avoid the question i ask you, and slowly right now i try not to ask so much, as long as the status is there.
I admitted i really break down at the point of time and i never ever break down for a guy before. 
But you make me do it.

All i hope 2014 will be a better year for me, for you and for us. 

I really love you. <3 p="">

Friday, December 27, 2013 ♥
♥ 12/27/2013 03:44:00 am

Merry Christmas 2013.

Time flies. I nearly forgotten I have this blog at all. Is shown time didn't wait for anyone, and is fair enough.

2013 2013 2013
Well well well, happened so much things as usual.
Oh yes, i am in a relationship with someone whom i truly love and wanna get marry with. A guy i am willing to do so much and sacrifice so much just for him. Is started very random, YES, RANDOM is the word i will use. We so deeply in love with each other. Been through so much and just for him.
It may sound stupid, may think im a fool, that life. Everyone went through that stage, isnt it.

But sadly to say, people change without you even noticing or he able to put a mask in front of you and acted everything seems alright for you and him, caused you to fall deeper into his trap and you cant even pull yourself back when you started to realize everything is so fake to you.

YES, unfortunately is happened on me recently.
He change to someone i don't even recognize anymore. I been wondering is it me or him. He told me, i hurt him alot. But we went to BKK like 2 month ago, he started new job one month ago and he change to a person completing different from last time, 3 weeks ago.
I had insomnia for past 2 weeks, crying every night, trying to make myself tired, push myself to the extend and wanted me to fall apart and coma forever. Cant sleep till 5 am even i have to work next day. Wondering is it worth it. I just don't want to let go.
YES, I AM STUBBORN
I trying to figure out what go wrong between us. Is it he fall in love with someone? Is it he possess? Is it he want to focus his career? or he don't love me anymore. Or worst to come to worst. He just change?

Wanted to save this relationship so much, i can pretend nothing happened, pretend he is still the same, pretend and doesn't want to know what he did outside as long he is still by my side.
Is sound foolish and alot of people would say, " just give up", or "he don't love you anymore"
But i still hope and hope he will be touch by whatever i did for him.
I didn't ask for expensive gifts, i didn't ask for accompany everyday. i didn't complaint he cant come and pick me up from work. All i want is something is care and concern. Is it very hard.

Well Well Well, all i can do now is stay by his side, quietly support him in anyway i can.



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